“Almost anything can be preserved in alcohol, except health, happiness, and money” — Mary Wilson Little
The story of Pinot Noir is rich and complex, with heady aromas of promiscuity, Roman conquest and monastic rituals. You could say it’s a juicy, full-bodied tale of revolution, lavish expense and mutations with a long, spicy finish with more than a hint of counterfeiting and greed.
So grab a glass and join us as we crack open the story of Pinot Noir.
NECTAR OF THE GODS
Pinot Noir – literally meaning black pine cone, due to its compact cluster and conical shape – is a very ancient variety of grape.
When the ancient Romans finally conquered Gaul (aka France) in 27 BCE, they came across an appetising wine enjoyed by the local inhabitants made from a grape variety unknown in Italy at the time. In fact, unknown pretty much everywhere, except for a few select areas of France.
This grape was Pinot Noir – literally meaning black pine cone, due to its compact cluster and conical shape – a very ancient variety, only one or two generations removed from the wild Vitis Sylvestris.
From the start the plant was somewhat amorous, quickly giving birth to numerous offspring, and today there are 16 unique Pinot Noir clones grown around the world.
When the Romans were driven out of Gaul by the Franks in the 5th century CE, the vineyards were left untended and fell into disrepair. Luckily, a saviour was at hand, somewhat aptly, in the form of the Catholic Church.
The local monks set about improving the varietal through patient and painstaking husbandry, and, by all accounts, succeeded so spectacularly that Pinot Noir became not only the official wine of the sacrament, but the preferred tipple of the Pope.
With the wine being endorsed by ‘God’ (or at least his living embodiment) , Pinot Noir promptly became the preferred wine of the local populace as well. Good for the goose, good for the gander, as they say.
GRAPES OF WRATH
From 1365 CE onwards, Burgundy became synonymous with Pinot Noir and indeed they are one and the same wine.
For the next seven hundred years, the story of Pinot Noir falls into abeyance. In fact, there is scarcely any mention of it until July 1395, when Philip the Bold of Burgundy made enemies of most of his Burgundian brethren by outlawing the region’s main red grape, Gamay, in favour of Pinot Noir.
Calling his kingdom’s big-yielding, safe-and-sure, cheap quaffing red an “evil and disloyal plant … injurious to the human creature”, Philip actually banished Gamay south to Beaujolais and insisted that henceforth, the Côte d’Or would only grow Pinot Noir. From that point onwards, Burgundy became synonymous with Pinot Noir and indeed they are one and the same wine.
During the French Revolution of 1789, the prized vineyards of Burgundy were split up and, in a fine display of newfound egalitarianism, distributed amongst the populace in small plots.
The Napoleonic Code further fragmented these vineyards into smaller plots, ruling that children divide the land equally upon the passing of their parents. As a direct result of this, most vineyards today in Burgundy have multiple owners, with some people owning just a single row, or maybe two, of the coveted vines.
PINOT ENVY
Burgundy’s Côte d'Or (literally, “Slope of Gold”) is a 30-mile long by 2-mile wide stretch of land that consistently produces some of Europe's finest Pinots.
Due in no small part to its exceptional bouquet and flavour, Pinot Noir has long been considered by the cognoscenti to be the “king of wines.”
A great Pinot noir is one of the most complex of all varietals and can be intense with a ripe-grape or black cherry aroma and accented with a spiciness that suggests cinnamon, or mint. Ripe tomato, mushroom, and ‘farmyard’ are also common descriptors used for identifying the king.
As it matures, Pinot Noir goes through a range of changes. A young wine will show simple fruity characteristics like cherry, plum and strawberry. But with ageing it will reveal more complex flavours such as chocolate, earthiness and truffles.
But Pinot Noir is not just popular because of its unique taste. It’s also highly-prized because of its scarcity.
The grape is extremely difficult to work with and is wildly susceptible to pretty much every known vine disease, weather change, mould, fungus and/or pest. This results in very low yields and consequently drives demand through the roof.
The problem is further compounded by the plant itself. Pinot Noir is genetically unstable, and a parent plant can produce offspring with wildly different berry sizes, shapes and even flavour. This makes it extremely difficult to guarantee the quality of the wine, and drives the value of good vintages to dizzying heights.
For comparison, Cabernet Sauvignon has 12 genetically distinct clones, but Pinot Noir has more than a thousand, including some you know like Pinot Gris and some you may not, like Pinot Meunier.
Finally, of course, there’s Pinot Noir’s extreme fussiness in regard to location. The plant needs chalky, well-drained soil, good sunlight exposure, gentle slopes and above average temperatures before it will even deign to produce a decent crop. And there are precious few places around the world that have this exact combination of requirements to yield good harvests.
Perhaps the most famous is Burgundy’s Côte d'Or (literally, “Slope of Gold”) a 30-mile long by 2-mile wide stretch of land that consistently produces some of Europe's finest Pinots. But over the last couple of centuries a handful of other countries have managed to successfully coax Pinot Noir into growth, including Germany, Switzerland and Italy as well as Chile, New Zealand and right here in Australia.
One of the most recently famous regions for producing fantastic Pinot Noir is Orange, approximately 250 km due west of Sydney. Colmar Estate is the most awarded vineyard in the region and their vintage 2018 Reserve Pinot Noir is a superb single vineyard wine from a cracking vintage.
RED BLOODED
“Pinot Noir is like sex. It’s good even when it’s bad.” - anonymous wine maker in Burgundy
Whatever the reasons for its popularity, the fact remains that Pinot Noir enjoys a cult-like following far beyond that of any other wine.
There is something lascivious in its complex flavours, and the language used to describe it often wanders into the sexual. Words like lush, silky, lusty, fleshy, supple, generous, graceful and ‘bosomy’ (really?) routinely pop up in tasting sessions.
As a Burgundy winemaker once said, “Pinot Noir is like sex. It’s good even when it’s bad.”
Interestingly, this is somewhat supported by modern medical theories, which suggest that Pinot Noir has aromatic compounds similar to the pheromones that stimulate sexual urges. Which is perhaps why Casanova, the 18th century Venetian superstud, was an avid lover of both women and Pinot Noir.
GRAPE WALL OF CHINA
In 2020 alone, 1.24 billion litres of wine was quaffed in the Middle Kingdom, making them the sixth biggest consumer in the world. Interestingly, over 80% of this wine was red.
China may have arrived late to wine, but has quickly made up for lost time.
In the last fifteen years, red wine has become the status symbol for China’s stupid rich as well as the emerging middle class. The Chinese routinely consume vast quantities of fine wine and think nothing of spending more than $30,000 a year on their favourite vintages.
In 2020 alone, 1.24 billion litres of wine was quaffed in the Middle Kingdom, making them the sixth biggest consumer in the world. Interestingly, over 80% of this wine was red.
The colour red is deeply ingrained in Chinese culture as a symbol for good luck. Red wine is therefore the perfect drink for ceremonies and celebrations and is said to bringing luck, power and fortune. By contrast, the colour white is associated with death, which explains why white wines such as Chardonnay are not nearly as successful as Burgundy and Bordeaux.
Unfortunately, as the demand for expensive red wine increases in China, so too do the incidents of counterfeiting.
Because an excellent bottle of Premier Cru Burgundy routinely sells for thousands of dollars, they are also the world’s most counterfeited bottles of wine, especially the older vintages. In fact, the Interprofessional Council of Bordeaux Wine estimates that almost 30,000 bottles of fake imported wine are sold every hour in China!
And Jeremy Oliver (no, not that one but the less famous Australian wine critic), has recounted horrifying stories of an average bottle of Champagne in China being filled seven times (!) and by his reckoning, almost 50% of wines selling for $35 or more in China are fake.
THE PSYCHOLOGY OF BURGUNDY
The colour Burgundy is often associated with higher class society and used conspicuously to display wealth or status. It’s rich hue and red shade are interpreted as signifying both sophistication and power.
So whether you want to look the height of sophistication or you just want to wear a colour that goes pretty well with anything, (just like the wine) then head to our website and order one of our vintage 2021 Pinot Noir Magic Fit® Tees. We guarantee you’ll be converted.
Cheers.
PS - Did you know that the world’s most expensive wine is a bottle of 1978 Domaine Romanee Conti that sold at auction for almost $500,000! Wild.